On a recent evening my wife and I went to Coconut Grove to have dinner, and as we were walking to the restaurant we came across a woman in distress. She was trying to get her car out of a parking space, but it had been blocked in by a car that had been parked by — and here I shall choose my words carefully — a complete jerkwad. The woman, with directions from her friend, had been trying for some time to maneuver the car out of there, but the other car was parked so inconsiderately that it looked impossible. My wife, a “can do” kind of person who does not mind getting involved, immediately swung into action. TOP VIDEOS × Barry University’s 5K/8K Nun Run is back! “My husband can get you out,” she said. “He’s an excellent parker.” Not to toot my own horn, but I am a pretty good parker. One time, in France, I managed to park a manual-shift rental car on a steep hill in a space so tricky that even the French drivers, who have no respect whatsoever for the laws of physics, did not attempt it. They’re probably still talking about my feat over there, in French. $2 for 2 months Subscribe for unlimited access to our website, app, eEdition and more CLAIM OFFER So with my wife having put my manhood on the line, I got into the driver’s seat and, after making 17 million maneuvers, each one moving the car roughly the length of a standard amoeba, I managed to get the woman’s car out of there. If there had been another coat of paint on that car, it would not have made it. The woman was very grateful. I, as a parker as well as a man, was deeply relieved. It was an emotional moment, reminiscent of the time US Airways pilot Chesley Sullenberger heroically landed that plane in the Hudson River, except with all due respect to Chesley, he was under less pressure to perform. But I’m not telling you this because I think I deserve a medal. I’m telling you this because I think I deserve a statue. No, I’m telling you this because of something everybody noticed about the car that had been parked so thoughtlessly. It had New York license plates.